Umagahang Hatid ni Manong Magpuputo

Napaisip ako nung isang araw, nung tinanong ako ng kaibigan kong hindi pamilyar sa lokal na kultura tungkol sa magpuputo. Nakatambay lang kami nang siya'y magitla sa narinig na torotot. Nanlaki ang mga mata--pagkatapos ay natawa. Ano yun? (pero sa Ingles). Sabi ko nagtitinda yun ng puto, sabay takbo ko palabas para hanapin, habulin kahit man lang ng tingin ang nagbebenta ng kakanin. Tanong niya ulit, bakit ganun yung tunog? Akala ko meron nang payaso sa likod ko. Natawa ako sandali, pero napaisip ako pagkatapos...Oo, nga no. Lahat ng ibang nagbebenta ng mga samu't-saring pagkaing pangkalsada ay isinigaw ang kanilang bentahe. Pero bakit si Manong Magpuputo'y nantotorotot? At bakit ganun ang tunog ng kanyang torotot?

Mabilisan akong naghalungkat sa kalat ng aking karanasan na hindi ko na naisip pang ayusin dahil sa mga nakagawian. Hindi ko na matandaan kung kelan ko natutunan ang mga patakaran ng mga bagay-bagay na ganito na mistulang maliliit at hindi "consequential" para sa mga Pilipino. Nagtagpi ako ng mga "lohikal" na dahilan. Mabilisang sabawan na may halo na din sigurong bolahan. Sabi ko na lang... Para hindi malito ang mga tao. Kasi magkasing tunog yung "taho" at "puto"...at ganun yung tunog ng torotot para hindi akalaing jeepney o tricycle o kung ano pa. May gumagamit na din kasi ng bell, yung mamang sorbetero. Kung tugtog naman, baka akalaing basurero.

Parang naniwala naman siya. Pero ako... iniisip ko pa kung tama. Mababaw ba?


[ang mga comments ay iincorporate/ico-consider para sa Illiterati zine issue # 2]

It doesn't matter how slow you go

All these thousands of years of human evolution has led us to a point where what seems important is how fast we can all get to somewhere and how fast we can get the job done once we get there. Fast cars, fast trains, crash courses, fast food, instant noodles, one-click friendship requests & confirmations, etc etc. A friends of mine shared an age-old adage from Confucius (not sure, and I refuse to google to confirm, leave me alone) which I have encountered some time back. "It doesn't matter how slow you go, as long as you don't stop." Incidentally, I have had a conversation with this same friend regarding time and relativity weeks ago.

This weekend is one of those rare slow ones. It's not that there is nothing for me to do; in fact my "to do" list is a mile long as usual (and I suspect it will be like that for all time unless I will myself to stop). I found that if I don't step out of the house, time slows down more. The minute I go out to do some errand, especially if I go to a mall, the minutes and the hours zoom past as fast as a jeepney driver with diarrhea. Anyway, the point tonight in resurrecting this Confucian quote, out from under all the subsequent data it has been buried under, is that I think, sometimes, people should do more than just slow down. I think there are times when we need the absolute silence and resolution in stopping. Once in a while. Just stopping and dropping everything.

And DO NOTHING--without falling asleep of course. I used to be good at this...when I tried it earlier, it felt... ridiculous.

I miss my tai-chi and eskrima arnis classes. And no I did not wear costumes like that, I don't think I ever left the beginner's level; it's just really the exercise and the calming effect on the mind these martial arts offer that I were after--something I realized much later on in life. There had been a few things in life that I got into that taught me the value of stopping, these sports were some of them. And then there is photography. You can't always shoot moving and relying on fast lens. I have always imagined photography as something akin to whatever it is that snipers do (snipering, teehee). You have to just stop and disappear so you can compose through the viewfinder and shoot what you want how you want when you need to.

Right, am I still making sense?

With that I share some photos I uploaded at AUDRNing (but which I set to public anyway). The first is some activities during the second day of the workshops and the other one is photos on the way to Intramuros, Manila coming from Miriam College in QC. Check out the cute kiddie laptops, XO. I had so much fun playing with these, and I don't think I'm the only one who did. :)

*Sigh* Here comes Monday. A toute a l'heure!

The weekend that was not (aka, How to not save a stray cat)

I knew when I got that phone call from my father last Friday that the weekend ahead was going to be rock n roll. Ay nako, it was.

I was getting ready for class when my phone rang. Having read somewhere that the secret to a less stressful life is to not gadgets such as clocks, watches, beepers, cell phones, email and appointment notifications run your life. That is, if you are currently preoccupied with something, especially if it is something you are enjoying such as eating a meal, pampering yourself, talking with a friend; don't be pressured to disrupt these things just because someone unwittingly encroached unto your personal time by sending a forwarded, pa-tweetums SMS.

Anyway, I virtuously ignored the ringing phone until I found a suitable Friday shirt to wear to school; and I gasped the moment I realized who had been trying to call me. Erpatsko_SMART. It rang again, and I answered in a split second.

"BAKIT HINDI MO SINASAGOT TELEPONO MO??"

Argh.

So anyway, I got scolded for that and for something else. Apparently, my Uncle Sonny who is based in Toronto flew in last week but only told the clan (my Aunt's family and my father) of his local presence on that Friday. What we think he did was he went the rounds visiting and hanging out with his friends during that week; and since he's done with that he can now hangout with family. When he was "interrogated" for this he told them that I knew about it all along because he told me about this trip. My father was now demanding why I didn't tell them. I was a bit taken aback by all of this and I was quick to tell them that I knew nothing about him being here. It's true!

Anyway, the whole Saturday the next day saw me and the rest of the clan at my aunt's. I used to dislike going to family reunions, they were the most stressful things. But now that it doesn't happen that often and everyone's older and have kids (the attention is no longer on my generation), I realize that reunions can actually be fun and relatives can actually be endearing.

I still have to tell you about the kitten that I found lying half-dead on the side of the road somewhere on Laguna Blvd. near Metrobank LTI. It was as if I didn't have a choice at that moment, and I instinctively picked it up and placed it inside a plastic bag I had been toting around. It meowed a few times but on the walk home, it was more or less silent. I can tell that it was very weak and sick and cold. I posted a status message asking for help; on twitter too. But no one responded to help; except for one person who, unfortunately, lived 8500 miles away from me.

Here, let me show you how the conversation went.










I tried my best to nurse her back to life but I really think that kitten had lost it's will to live. It looked depressed as hell and I suspect that it once was a house pet (it looked well-kept for a street cat). It probably died more out of sadness than hunger or disease. It had these really big and beautiful pair of green eyes that just stared at me every time I came near her to try to give it something to drink or eat. I couldn't help but get the feeling she was trying to remember me so just in case we meet again in some lifetime, she would recognize me. I stared back at her one time, for several minutes--you know those staring contests you played with friends as kids? It made me think if I was right in prolonging her suffering like that just because I felt guilty about the cruelty of mankind on the rest of life on earth.

She died around 10pm last night; I buried it in my backyard a couple of hours ago. I'm off to work now. Til next time.

Just sharing some music

I made a playlist for a friend who I recently found out also listened to / appreciated some of the kinds of music I am crazy about. My first venture into ska,neo-swing, swingska, then later on jazz and fusion types all started with (believe it or not) PUNK. The first punk bands I really got into were the old school, punkrock/streetpunk/oi/punkska/hc bands like Operation Ivy (which later on went to become Rancid), The Ramones, Stiff Little Fingers, the Clash, Minor Threat, Agnostic Front, SickOfItAll, BlackFlag, UKSubs, MightyMightyBosstones, etc etc etc... I can go on forever.

I made a short playlist (15 minutes lang, enough for a morning's jog) of my choice Operation Ivy, btw. I'll upload that again next if I find enough people who'd be interested (raise your hands please).

But these songs are from two of my fave ska/jazz/swing&whatnot bands. I'll share it with you. Download while it's there (will be taking it down in a few days). Enjoy Skatmondo!!!

Pete

Loose pages from an old journal fell from a storage box this morning, while I was getting my life organized. I came across an excerpt that I took down from a former co-faculty’s “open letter” to the UPLB community during the height of the Chancellor David, et. al. brouhaha. While I wasn’t a big fan of Pete back then, I admit now that he did have a few a couple of one redeeming qualityies. This excerpt from that impassioned open letter makes me forget—if only for a moment’s rest from these chores—his atrocious dorkiness and bouts of depravation.


“If teachers fail to defend themselves in principle and in action aginst any power that robs them of their rights and dignity, what right do they have to teach students of lesser means and privilege that they could likewise defend? If chancellors and chairs could command obedience and concensus by force rather than by reason, then of what use are teachers of Philosophy who cannot prove by example that knowledge of logic and reason is necessary or even a “good” thing? But shadows only thrive where ignorance and fear remain a cave and a prison, and people have no other choice but to be deceived.

I refuse to be deceived.”

—Ulysses Aureus, Instructor of Philosophy, Dept. of Humanities, CAS, UPLB, 2000-2003

extra: I had a major crush on his dad back in my literary grasshopper days in UPDil. I guess Pete got his name from the Joyce novel. Hmm. No comment.

My Childhood Library

One of the highlights of my week was the trip to my old grade school/high school, De La Salle Zobel. Although I have been back there several times since I graduated in--well, I won't tell!--I had really only been back for some specific events that allowed me only enough time to go to one place--the Zobel theater. This would usually be for the Pacquiao fights.

Last Wednesday, however, Prof. Malu, Prof. Neri and I were invited to check out ZoobTV: DLSZ's radio and TV studio. We walked around some parts of the campus, some offices (met the Bro Pres). All throughout the "official business" though, I have been waiting for the right time to ask Mrs. Balgos (the one who entertained us) if I could perhaps go and check out my most memorable hang out during my 13 years in DLSZ: the library.

She said, yes of course. It's still there, where I remember it to be: at the basement of the main building. Malu and Neri obliged and was more than happy to check the library out with me. I really had one mission there. I was eager to see if all the books I have read as a child were still there.

Well, waddya know?!?





Sadly, a lot of the old Nancy Drew, Hardy Boys, Dana Girls have been discarded because they were so old and destroyed already (according to the current librarian). I couldn't even find Bobsey Twins anymore, and most of the Judy Blume novels. But I was ecstatic to find that some of the books still had their old call cards and two still had my name on them!!! (WOWOOWOW!!!) \m/ astig di ba???!

Assimilation (sacrificial post for my writing class)

Important Note: This is a journal entry from way back 2005, posted merely for my writing class' exercise in methods of exposition and partially because I am delighted with what you guys have been posting so far. The others who still have nothing posted on their blogs...well, we are waiting.




Assimilation
The process of receiving new facts or of responding to new situations in conformity with what is already available to consciousness – (Merriam-Webster, 2009)



Last night sent me on a rollercoaster, or rather, he had me riding an emotional rollercoaster. He said he and I were going to have dinner at their place and I was to meet his mother. Yes, in a declarative tone, like he was delivering the latest traffic update. I went through the emotional stages—albeit, probably not in order—that normal human beings go through went confronted with such predicaments.

Denial (ha? Ano sinabi mo? What mother?); Anger (ang daya mo, sabi mo sa kin April, tapos March, tapos Feb, tapos nextweek…tapos ngayon ngayon na?! Sumosobra ka na!!); Bargaining (please, next week na lang, I’ll just finish the work I have to do and wala talaga ako sa kondisyon ngayon); Self-deprecation (lagi na lang ikaw masusunod, lagi mo na lang ako binu-bully. Kawawa naman ako!); until finally Acceptance (fine, goddamit! Is my hair okay?!)

So I met his mother, and she wasn’t bad. Not bad at all. She’s actually cool: very sprightly, warm, and frank. A bit intimidating especially when she looks at you with a gaze that kind of holds you in your place, but she can whisk all that in a second when she smiles at you. I don’t know her yet, so I can’t make generalizations.

Meeting his other friends, though, got me down. Really down. I don’t know why, because they’re a cool bunch—amazing in fact. But they—all of them including him—just made me realize how much I miss my friends, the kids at the punk gigs, the fellas in the pit. How much comfortable I was with people who sang the same songs, who moved to the same music. Now they seem so…I don’t know, maybe, far and out of reach. I felt strangely out of place. Awkwardly uprooted.

And because I am the kind of person I am, I know I will make no such effort to fit in. Oo, bahala na.



-----oh, I found a photo, too-----




Me and then co-faculty, Charelle, ca. 2005 (around the time I wrote that) taken during a DLSC College faculty get-together bonfire.


Have a great weekend. \m/